Former flash bastard Lloyd Banks back living with his mum


Former flash bastard Lloyd Banks has fell from grace as his business crumbles leaving the British nation confused as to whether to laugh at his demise or be concerned about the effects.

The London-based investor had previously held millions of people to ransom by using his incredible wealth as a tool to bully and manipulate those in need of financial support.

However, with his business failing, Lloyd has now been forced to trim his workforce and close several of his offices.

He has claimed the collapse is due to Brexit but those closest to him revealed his business was already floundering due to several poor investments and was being crippled by his own extravagant bonus payments.

Mr Banks was reportedly spotted cashing in all his gold at a pawn shop recently and has not been seen back in the betting shop since he borrowed £20 off one of his fellow punters to place a losing bet.

He is currently sleeping back in his old room at his mum and dads after he failed to make the rent on his plush city apartment following a spending spree by his 22-year-old girlfriend. She later broke up with him when she realised he could no longer keep her in the style she had become accustomed.

Mr Banks remained positive about the future, saying: “It’s all ups and downs, I’ve still got access to millions of people’s savings, and things can look so much better after a few spins of the Roulette wheel, c’mon red, c’mon red!

“And if that doesn’t work… I can always rely on the government to bail me out with a few billion because I’m too big to fail. Bullet proof!”


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