Chauffeur driven Bentley with a drinks cabinet and mini-fridge in the back? I’ll have some of that!

Just been chattin’ to old Dykie about which games I should attend this weekend. I was happy to stay in London thinking I could catch most of the action on MOTD but he insisted I must show willing on the opening weekend of the season.

Big Sam's England Diaries

I wasn’t happy ‘til he explained I get driven around wherever I want by some suited driver in a top of the range motor – you’ve finally made it Sam me old boy!

I had planned to wait for the West Ham game to see Andy Carroll in action but Dykie said I’d need to ration my Hammers games this season, to at least give the impression of a man who is still investigating the best options with an open mind.

He also pointed out its not ‘til Monday and I would be back in time for it anyway. I’ll trust his judgement – he did pick me after all.

So where to go Saturday? The Everton Spurs game is the obvious choice but it doesn’t really appeal to be honest. Can I really be arsed spending two hours watching Kyle Walker run up and down, Ross Barkley over complicate things and Harry Kane lumber about like a player ten years his senior?

I think I can, given that the next best options are Hull v Leicester – I’ll send Shakespeare to that one – or Palace v Brom – no thanks, Pardew, Pulis, keep learning from the master!

Besides, being up north gives me the chance to hop across to the Etihad for the evening KO to see my old side Sunderland. Let’s see if Moyes can undo all my good work as fast as he did Fergie’s.

Also interested to see the great Pep in the flesh. Our paths have never crossed, since he’s never cut his teeth in a Premier League dogfight where you really sort the men from the boys. It’ll be interesting to meet the man in person and pick his brain.

I’ll catch him in the bar after the game to make sure we’re on the same page regarding the development of young John Stones.

I fear he’ll want to encourage him to ‘play out from the back’, whereas I’ll be sending out the opposite message of ‘get rid of it’ when I get his ear.

I’m sure we will come to a happy compromise, great minds think alike and all that. Must remember to not get too excited and down a load of free ale before we meet, want to make a good impression.

Previous entries

Thursday 11 August – Excited as a YTS kid who gets to clean the shit off the club captain’s boots.

Friday 5 August – A pleasing development today as a superstar from yesteryear has declared that he wants to join the good ship Allardyce.

Thursday 4 August – I love Fergie he’s my best friend, we see each other as equals. I call him Fergie, not Sir Alex, and he doesn’t mind.

Wednesday 3 August – I sent the boys in the squad an email today to introduce them to the new boss man. Very clever as it served a dual purpose.

Monday 1 August – It’s been a productive day, giving the old noggin a heavy workout with one of my intellectual pals.

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