Donald Trump’s campaign manager was sacked after claiming there is a link between guns and people getting shot.
Scoop Alley can exclusively reveal that Corey Lewandowski made the claim without thinking when Trump said he wanted to use criminal profiling to predict which group of people would be most likely to gun down innocent Americans.
The correct answer was supposed to be Muslims but Lewandowski was tired from overwork and before he had time to stop himself he blurted out the first random thought that came into his head.
He said: “Isn’t it f…ing obvious? Those lunatics we sell guns to are the ones who go out and shoot people… hey, and fruitcakes with automatic rifles can massacre dozens of people within seconds.”
The claims were met with stunned silence in the Trump camp. Although the link between guns and killings is widely understood in the world of the sane, it came as a complete surprise to Trump and his supporters.
The claim was so startling that some refused to believe it. The gun lobby, the National Rifle Association, immediately dismissed the claims as a Muslim plot to undermine American values.
A spokesman said: “Someone has got to Lewandowski. Everyone knows that mass shootings only happen because we don’t have enough guns. If children in schools had weapons they’d be able to protect themselves against Muslim attack…that’s where we should be focusing our attention to make America great again.”
Trump had always liked Lewandowski for his aggressive and unpleasant manner but felt he had no alternative but to tell him: You’re fired.
Meanwhile, Trump’s aides have been told to carry out further research on criminal profiling and this time come up with the correct answer that it’s Muslims who are to blame for shootings.