Have the NHS expert doctors given you advice about your health that you don’t like? Are they making you face up to scary things like heart problems…or piles, or anything you’d rather not think about.
Have they bored you senseless about five a day and exercising more, even though they know you hate getting up from the sofa?
We feel your pain.
The trouble with these so-called ‘expert qualified doctors’ is that they have medical degrees and years of experience. Their expertise forces them to find your health issues and then urge you to take action to tackle them.
But don’t worry. You don’t have to listen to them. There is an alternative. If you don’t like uncomfortable truths, it’s time to see the Brexit doctor.
We have totally different approach to traditional NHS doctors. We don’t bother with training and knowledge and experience…boring. We ensure that all our doctors have no medical experience and have taken the hypocritical oath to never tell you uncomfortable truths. Instead, they always tell you stuff that will make you feel better and make them richer.
We know you’re tired of these elitists telling you what to do, so when you come to the Brexit Medical Practice we won’t alarm you about your illnesses because we haven’t got a clue what we are. Instead, we will employ the latest thought process techniques we’ve been developing for many years.
It’s called: Tell people whatever lies they want to hear.
We can banish all your ailments with just a few words telling you that you’re doing great. And if you do have a bit of dicky heart, we’ll tell you not to worry because your teeth are in great shape. And that will make up for any loss of function in your cardio-vascular what nots. Who even understands that stuff?
Don’t let those NHS doctors tell you what to do. Don’t let the Project fear merchants talk down your wonderful British health because you can get well without their mumbo jumbo medicine.
You’ll be much happier with us because we’ll only tell nice, warm fuzzy things. And you know you’ll believe us because you so want it to be true.
Beautiful lies or uncomfortable truth?
It’s no contest is it? So, come along, don’t be shy. Strip away all that rational thought stuff. Life’s much easier without it.
Remember, you’re fit as a fiddle, the picture of health…fit as butcher’s dog.
There now, doesn’t that feel better.
By the way, would you like to buy some health insurance? Why get free treatment on the NHS when you can make Brexit billionaires even richer by paying for health care instead.
Go on, you know it makes Brexit sense.