Here at Scoop Alley we think it is important the nation gets to know the person running the country.
Prime Minister Theresa May was kind enough to share a few minutes with us and tell us her five favourite console games. So Theresa… three, two, one, Go!
Forget your Call of Duty bollocks that the kids are playing nowadays, Goldeneye on the N64 is the greatest shoot’emup of all time. Me and Philip used to spend hours at a time going head to head shooting the shit out of each other. I was always Natalya of course, as beautiful as she is deadly. Philip was always Bond, my very own 007.
Sonic the Hedgehog
This takes me back to my early career in politics. It was probably the amount of time I was spending on Sonic that cost me my seat in parliament in 1992. Collecting those gold rings was just so satisfying! By 97 I had successfully weaned myself off them and was able to take my seat in the commons.
Is there anything more enjoyable than driving a cartoon go kart around rainbows, jungles and beaches shooting green and red shells at your rivals? If there is then I don’t know about it. All great fun but just a game of course, hopefully someone can get that message to Kim Jong-un before it’s too late. I used to love getting the ghost, so I could shy away from the limelight while despatching my rivals to get to the front.
I remember back in the day when you had to invite your chums over if you wanted a FIFA tournament, not like now where it’s all on the ‘internet’. Bloody kids, don’t know they’re born. I was always firmly in the FIFA camp over Pro Evo, I could never get used to their buttons. ’03 was the greatest ever version cos you could score free kicks from absolutely anywhere so long as you could stop the marker in the green line, which I was the exemplary at. Becks was the must have player at the time, perhaps now I’m PM I will finally get the chance to meet him.
We still get this out now at Cabinet meetings if it is a particularly slow day. I’m always Chun Li. “I’m the strongest woman in the world.” (Fuck off Hillary). Boris likes E Honda, the slippery, fat, grotesque creature, E Honda that is of course lol. Fox is always Ryu, the chiselled adonis, I could watch him button bash all day. Unfortunately, our Street Fighter sessions are usually cut short when Leadsom spits her dummy out and throws her controller at the wall cos she’s had her arse kicked by Hammond, he knows all the combinations for the special moves, the sad bastard.